Monday
Nov282016

Double Portrait

Brittany Perham


 

I want to kiss you now I want to kiss you
then I want to kiss you again I want to kiss you
when your mouth is full of chocolate
& when your mouth is full of wine &
though your mouth is not always mine
for kissing I want to kiss you I want to
kiss you in the morning before you've eaten
one sweet bite of the apple left by the bed
in the French tradition I want to kiss you
when at night you set the apple very red
by the bed I want to kiss you & in bed
when you say this is the French tradition
of lovers I want to kiss you though I'm skeptical
I want to kiss you & when you say I want to kiss you
I want to kiss you more & while I'm kissing you
I want to kiss you again & again I'm sad
while kissing you nearly weeping
while kissing you you're so close
to leaving & when you're gone I kiss you
in memory & even now kissing you gone
gone even now kiss even now I'm kissing you

 

I want to kill you when I wake up
I want to kill you all day & after I kill you
I want to nap & wake up killing you
again when you're leaving I want to kill you
when you leave after kissing me
I want to kill you especially
after kissing so good I want to kill you
with hacksaw with chainsaw with each cliché
blade I want to kill you by opening
each time-release pill & releasing
their trueblue granules into your soda
killing you through bendable straw
killing you with these little hands with my toes
in your nose my underwear in your mouth
I want to invent new ways to kill you who
needs a hacksaw a chainsaw I'll kill you
by communicating with God I'll kill you
by believing in God if I have to I'll kill you off
in my dreams even if it means I have to kill off
sleep I'll kill you & keep you from leaving
& kissing-&-leaving & leaving myself I'll kill you

 

I miss you meteorically metaphorically
I miss you merrily missing you
makes me mistake other women on the street
for you missing you I miss
my train I miss your train when missing you
I miss the exit ramp I miss you
& there's an empty wine glass
in my chest & my chest thinks it's missing
organs so I miss my heart I miss the way
it feels to have a stomach I miss you mornings
afternoons nights missing you sucks
away the day missing you I mis-teach meter
rhyme how to scan a line missing you like
there's no tomorrow there's no tomorrow
in which I do not miss you missing you
makes me sweaty makes me mad is maddening
I miss you & mis-punctuate or don't miss missing
punctuation altogether I miss you
murderously I miss you mountainously
metaphorically & actually I miss you most
minutes before you even leave I'm missing you